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[chrisisofaith]

UN: ravens

You've reached Chris Sonom, previously of Melvaunt Deismyr, please leave a message.

Comments

[midnightroads]

#5 is a Thing, yeah. I don't really always know what to do in the face of people who don't meet me where I am in terms of 'trying not to be an asshole'.

[chrisisofaith]

Were it me, I'd gauge their usefulness against the effort needed to maintain knowing them.

I wouldn't use me as an example, however.

For you, I'd recommend cutting losses on anyone not willing to treat you with the respect you deserve.

[midnightroads]

Okay.

And how do I know how much respect I deserve?

[chrisisofaith]

How much respect do you give other people?

[midnightroads]

Okay, now how are we even measuring?

[chrisisofaith]

Bash, I'm worried that we even have to specify

[midnightroads]

It’s not like, that bad, is it?

[chrisisofaith]

That you don't know how much respect you should be receiving from others? That you can't name a baseline?

Yes
That's bad

What sort of treatment would you consider unacceptable from someone interacting with one of your subs?

[midnightroads]

Anything they weren't into. Anyone making them feel small or lesser--without negotiating that in advance, I mean, I know Jeff's looking into getting himself some...right, off-topic. But, like.

They oughta have someone looking out for them because both of them aren't so good at always looking out for themselves, and that's part of what being a Dominant is for.

[chrisisofaith]

Right and what about the dominant himself?
Don't you deserve at least that much?

You look out for them but who looks out for you?

[midnightroads]

I've never needed anyone to look out for me.

[That's the immediate response. A moment later:]

Fuck.

[chrisisofaith]

I think it's time to rethink that, lovely

You might be a dom, but you're a person with needs and need for boundaries first. You ought be looking out for you, but I'm not sure you know how and I don't mean that meanly

Maybe you need someone to keep track for you as well. At least for a bit.

[midnightroads]

I don't want to place that kind of work on anyone's plate. Which I know, that's a symptom of the thing as well, but. I don't know anyone who needs to take on that burden.

[chrisisofaith]

Have you asked?
You didn't need to take on that burden and yet you did.

Don't trip yourself before you've even bothered trying to stand, Bash.

You could try talking to your subs, if you don't want to 'burden' (stupid word) anyone else. They might surprise you. It might help them to have someone else to look out for and, if they're really worth your time, they'll love you enough to want to help anyway.

[midnightroads]

I'll think about it.

[chrisisofaith]

Promise me you will

[midnightroads]

I promise I'll think about it.

[chrisisofaith]

Thank you.
It's a start

[midnightroads]

You're still mean.

But thank you. And I'm sorry for dumping this at you.

[chrisisofaith]

Oh the meanest, I know. Maybe I should say 'good boy'

You're welcome, and I'll not be accepting apologies at this time.

[midnightroads]

Damn, is that why they like hearing 'good boy' so much? That just made EVERYTHING feel a bit better.

[chrisisofaith]

Very likely. Do you need a bit of aftercare, Bash?

Serious question

[midnightroads]

[Another pause before he answers. Not as long, but definitely noticeable.]

Yes. Please.

[chrisisofaith]

[He notes the pause and starts gathering his things.]

You've got it.
Where are you? I can come to your place or come pick you up to go elsewhere.

[midnightroads]

I'm at home, and it's just me here right now. Also, I've been crying, so I'm a little bit of a mess. If we go out, I'll need to clean up beforehand if you wanna avoid awkward questions.